The path to Passion & Success is a lonely one
You probably heard the saying tons of time. Success is a lonely road. It’s one of the greatest cliches when it comes to talking about success in life. Although it is a cliche, it is still true. Therefore, it is a must that you become prepared for this. Most people can’t handle it. They simply can’t travel alone along this journey, instead, they are always confined to the pact. They aren’t individuals. It’s normal to be scared because you are going to be traveling alone, don’t worry. But in order for you to become successful, you have to separate yourself from the masses and act in your own self-interest.
But I don’t think the presence of such people necessarily has anything to do with banishing loneliness, especially for leaders. Just because you are working with such people doesn’t mean you can get close to them, share your vulnerabilities with them, or develop other markers of deep friendship. You can have great working relationships with all kinds of people but still feel lonely.
Indeed, there is usually significant pressure on the leader of any kind of enterprise to maintain outward optimism, enthusiasm, and energy regardless of how he/she feels. You can’t go into a meeting with employees and say, “Guys, I just really don’t feel optimistic about this company today. In fact, I wish I could just take the afternoon off and watch Netflix until I feel better.”
However, deep inside you know exactly where to turn for guidance and support – but on your own path, you’re relying on your own instinct and judgment to guide you. As you venture on and the more you succeed, you begin feeling your isolation. You’ve had to learn everything all over again and you become more and more self-reliant and self-content. And because you pursued your passion, nobody is able to hold your hand and walk you through it.
As you achieve one goal after another, you recognize a formula that works for you and often enough, you’re the only one that recognizes this and understands it. So tenacity and determination set in which overwhelm your emotions. Then when you have a moment to spare, after a long day of pursuing your dream, your emotions have a chance to surface and you may begin to feel homesick. You’ll feel like giving up because nobody else gets it.
These feelings of loneliness can cause you to turn back to a familiar way of life, albeit unfulfilling. When success makes you feel alone, you must first remind yourself of why you embarked on your journey. Trigger motivation and a positive mindset by remembering why you ventured onto this path and why you found/seek fulfillment within it.
But the sad thing is that when you start sharing with people that you are winding down some of your fun activities for a while and you will not be joining them for the usual get together, they may react a bit resentful for example.
Why Success is a Very Lonely Road
You may get upset, frustrated, and even have the desire to give up when certain things are not going flawlessly as you planned it to be. My advice to you: Don’t give up! The goal here is not to avoid such setbacks but rather to learn how to use them to your advantage by making them work for you instead of against you.
The road to success is a very lonely one. What I mean by that is that the sacrifices you have to make often leave you feeling isolated, like a lone wolf walking down a path looking for its prey. But realize that it filters the weak person out from the determined.
In missing sunny days and not being as social as your friends, you inevitably distance yourself, and people around you will feel like you are ignoring them. Weekend nights at home working on your dreams can often leave you feeling like one of those hermits walking across some desolated mountains.
The problem is that we live in a society where people believe – you need to be in constant interaction with others in order to consider them friends.
These are the kind of people that you will start to see less and less. A very small number of people will understand that you need to focus on your future and that is the reason why you are no longer hanging out with them. That small group of people will be happy to hang out with you even if it takes years to see you again.
You will find yourself having fewer friends. The sacrifices you make on the path to becoming successful come with a high price at times, but it is worth your while. Most people look at those who have more success with bitterness, jealousy, and even hatred. They fail to realize the work you had to put in while they were having fun.
Most of the people that you have ever considered friends in life will eventually be nothing but strangers to you.
Nothing is meant to last forever no matter how good it may be. All things in life must come to an end eventually.
Some people have this strange and unrealistic attachment to the bond they have with their friends. They feel losing old friends and making new ones is too traumatic and they feel betrayed when a friend of theirs decides that they need to take care of their own lives and they need to distance themselves from the activities they used to do often.
This is the main reason why successful people will constantly tell you that the road to success is lonely, but you need to take the courage to walk that lonely road.
You need to remind yourself that all your friends will have problems of their own in the future and they will not be able to live their whole lives the way they do right now.
It is very likely that none of your friends will be able to help you out when you have financial problems, because they will have their own problems to think about. This is the main reason why you should always put your needs and the needs of your family above anything else. The longer you spend worrying about pleasing your friends and having to please them in order to maintain a friendship, the harder it will be for you to be successful!
Most people can’t handle it
Success isn’t an easy task. No one is going to be there with you, holding your hand along the way. It’ll just be you, putting in the work every single day all by yourself. Think you can handle that? Most people can’t. They can’t handle being an individual who stands up for their dreams. Most people aren’t willing to be outcasted for a short period to achieve the success they desire long-term. The pain to gain ratio is perceived by them to be too high, meaning the pain of achieving success isn’t worth it to them. For me, the pain is something I choose to accept as part of the process and rather than trying to avoid it. I allow and validate the pain and then tackle it head-on by letting the feelings wash over me for a short period of time. Hey, no pain, no gain, right?
The Path to Success is a Journey
The path to success is a journey, one small step at the time, day after day, week after week, month after month. If you believe your dream is worth it; then you must commit to it, make the sacrifices you have to, and endure the loneliness.
It is through trials and errors, and failures that you learn. If you fail somehow and then, decide to work harder or find another way for the next time around, you will most likely succeed. But if you lose willpower on the first few obstacles coming your way, then you will continue to fail.
Do not be afraid to dream big, set goals that most think are impossible. The harder you work, the better your bed feels as you lay in it. Be aware, use your abilities and be your best. Once you make the commitment to succeed, keep going!
The key if Patience
There is another key on your way to success, and it is called patience. Too many people are in such a hurry for instant gratification, and do not understand the real signification of “Success Overnight.”
To be successful, you have to be patient. The motto of the accomplished man is “Let’s try again and again.” It is your determination, hard work, patience and trust in the process that lead to success.
You have to face the challenges that life throws up at you because it is the only way to succeed. If you look at the life of any successful person, you will see that they had to face many challenges and struggles.
You have to do the same at some point, even if people doubt you. But understand that it is then that you know you are doing it. It also depends on the person you are. Are you the type which fuels you to go after what you want, no matter what others say?
If you rise when you fall, you will succeed.
If you know what you are doing and what is right for you, you are not making a mistake following it through
When everyone else seems to be at odds with your efforts to better yourself and your life, when everyone is criticizing you, when you find yourself drifting away from people, it is easy to activate that part of you that harbors doubt—I think we all have that within us somewhere—and you will start to question whether you are doing the right thing, or if other people are right. You will wonder if doing what makes you happy is worth all these uncomfortable changes and conflicts with others.
It can be tempting to just go back to how you were, or scale down your goals a bit so they are not as ‘controversial,’ or bold. But, chances are, if you have gotten to the point where you are experiencing this part of the journey, you are pretty damn sure about what it is you want in life, and the type of person you want to be.
Giving it up, or modifying it, so you can better fit in with the people around you, or avoid upsetting them, is not the answer. You are just trying to better yourself, and that will create change in every area of your life. You are just trying to be happy, and so long as that pursuit is not directly impinging on someone else’s well-being or truly hurting people, you have every right to do that. There is a difference between truly hurting someone and making him upset because doing what you want interferes with what he wants.
It sucks when other people don’t get it, or it means certain people will no longer be a major part of your life, but change is the only constant in life, and we can’t avoid it. If you know what you are doing is right for you, you have to keep doing it.
That sense of knowing is coming from your higher self, the part of you that is pure consciousness and all-knowing. The part of you that knows exactly what would make you happiest and lead to the most fulfilling life. The part of you that is not hampered by all the muck that comes with the human experience.
If you can remember this, you will be much less likely to give up, or compromise, because you know you will be defying this perfect wisdom. You will be more accepting of the obstacles that pop up because you will realize you are on the right path, and you will take them as they come.
You will loose people
Losing friends and family is a real possibility and something that happens to a lot of people who decide to chase after the massive success the dream of achieving. Some friends and family could turn their backs on you, leave you feeling isolated and betrayed. Understand that the reason why some of your friends and family will start to distance themselves, unexpectedly despise and outcast you is that they secretly wish for you not to change, for you to stay the same as how you were rather than changing into who you’re becoming. They might see this transformation as a threat, and unconsciously they’re doing what they need to do to protect themselves from being hurt by you in the future. The friends that leave you now aren’t the friends that you would keep around in the future anyway, so take this as a blessing rather than a curse. Instead of having to be the bad guy in the future, they did the dirty work for you and left you with your hands clean.
When you commit to achieving something great, all the small things in life fall by the wayside. You live every day working to get closer to your dream. Every action you take is well calculated and executed to bring you closer to being successful. You must accept no excuses and not allow obstacles to stand in your way. When you want it bad enough, enough to believe it is why you breathe the air you do, you will kill to fulfill your commitment.
Faliure is supposed to be faced alone
When you fail, it feels like there’s no one there to support you and pick you back up. Remember the friends that left you and the family that decided to turn their back on you? Do you think they care that you failed? Well, they might act like it, but deep down they’re jumping up and down with joy, and they can’t wait to tell you “See I was right, and you were wrong! I told you that you were making a mistake!’ When your blog doesn’t get any hits, your youtube video doesn’t get any plays, or your business takes a downturn and takes a loss, the person that’s affected by it the most is you. Only you have to experience these feelings because, in the end, it’s your failure and no one else. But Failure is not an excuse to quit. Failure is just feedback that lets you know what doesn’t work. Take that information, get the hell back up and get back on the road and never allow yourself for even one second to entertain the thought of giving up. Fail harder. Fail better. Fail until the thought of failure no longer scares you. Fail until you succeed. Don’t become another carcass on the path to success, another checkpoint for another adventurer to pass up on his or her way to the top of the mountain of success.
The path to success is filled with the carcasses of those who tried and failed and although passing those people might feel good, remember that you’re not there to beat them. You’re there to reach the end goal and become successful. Don’t let the time, energy, and livelihood you sacrificed every day that you were lonely and depressed go to waste. Success is a lonely road, and it’s even lonelier on the top, but I bet there’s one hell of a view up there and that’s a perspective that I’m not willing to miss out on.
Being committed to achieving a dream will ultimately result in you having to make sacrifices. Most will have to sacrifice their social life, relationships, family, and free time. This is inevitable. It filters the weak out from the determined. If no sacrifices were required everyone would be as successful at their craft as Warren Buffet, Bill Gates, Michael Jordan, or Brad Pitt.
One of the rules of economics is you always face trade-offs; there is an opportunity cost to every choice you make. If you decide to do Activity A, you cannot focus that time and energy on Activity B. For college students to get straight A’s they must sacrifice some weekend parties. The opportunity cost of staying in and reading law textbooks as compared to attending a party on Saturday night is too much sacrifice for many students.
- “I won’t be as popular.”
- “Drinking with my friends is too much fun.”
- “I need to relax and let some steam off.”
- “I need to get laid.”
There is nothing wrong with prioritizing these over getting straight A’s, to each their own. Everyone should do what makes him or her happy at the end of the day. That being said, those who are not willing to sacrifice for greater college success should not wonder why those who did sacrifice their Saturday nights performed at a higher level.
Most successful people had to work very hard to reach their current status.
If everyone was able to be successful by making average efforts, there would be way too many successful people out there, but we all know that this is not the case. They are a minority because successful people will usually have to work extra hard and make a lot of sacrifices to find true success.
Remember the road to the top might be lonely, but you can be sure it will be worth it.
So prove them wrong
INo excuse can be created. This shall motivate you. All your loved ones that didn’t believe in you, you should let this fuel the fire inside you and let it guide you down success. You need to prove these people wrong. After every failure, you need to keep going because you can’t let these people get their way and say ‘I told you so’. You can’t let the dream killers kill the dream chasers. Once people laugh in your face after you tell them your dreams you need to let this inspire you to prove all these people wrong.
Some might argue that all the doubters made Tupac who he was. He let the haters fuel him into becoming one of the greatest rappers this world has ever seen. You need to be like Tupac, instead of becoming discouraged when people strike your dreams down, you need to become encouraged and prove those bastards wrong. Once you encounter a failure, just think about how good it is going to feel once you have accomplished whatever it is those people said you couldn’t and when you get to look them in the face and tell them you did it. Just imagine the feeling. Let it fuel you. This shall give you the inspiration to get up after every failure that you encounter in life. As the old saying goes…
“The greatest pleasure in life is doing things that people said you couldn’t.”
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